Finishing The Race

Pursuing God One Shin Splint at a Time

The Hurt and the Healing

#WITHI’ve experienced the most healing and the most hurt in my life from church. I tell you this while I sit in the messy middle of it all.

When my husband died in a car accident while I was pregnant with our second child, it was the church who came to my rescue. At the time I didn’t realize it was Jesus in them helping me. I was sure I had pushed Him away to protect myself, since He obviously didn’t care or the omnipotent God wouldn’t have let this tremendous hurt happen.

Or so I thought.

Jesus’ church took care of me, staying up all night holding my newborn son, feeding us soul food for close to a year, nursing me back to a place where the idea of praying didn’t bring me in anguish to my closet floor.

Until I came to such extreme grief, I was comfortable. I thought church was the place you go on Sundays to be “good” and get credit on God’s checklist of acceptance. I lived complacent, ineffectual, and relatively happy.

But once I had to rely on His people to get me out of bed and feed my children, it got personal.

When I began walking my road of despair, I didn’t know how much I needed people, the flesh of Jesus in my life. I was brought to a place of brokenness and extreme solitude as I wandered in my mind down paths I never knew needed exploring. What purpose do I serve alive? Why would an all-loving creator allow us to suffer? Was there a way to escape God and His agenda? It was all too much for me. Please click here to continue reading over at http://amberchaines.com/therunamuck/

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I’ve been reading Amber Haine’s blog for years and she published her first book last month, Wild in the Hollow. It’s her memoir of how her extreme brokenness led her to find the path back home to where healing begins. It reads like a fast-paced thriller, but the themes and stories she tells are heart-wrenching and can be re-read many times each sitting you’ll find yourself exploring your own journey in a new way. I was nervous and thrilled to see she asked for guest posts over the themes from the book, so here’s what came from my experience. I can’t thank you enough for reading and being on this journey “home” with me. Here’s a link to purchase and read reviews http://www.amazon.com/Wild-Hollow-Chasing-Desire-Finding/dp/0800724070/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1435101704&sr=8-1&keywords=wild+in+the+hollow

2 Comments

  1. “..at the end of the day, it’s family on the road to home.” I like that.

    Reading your story helps. I sit in the messy middle myself these days. Between the hurt and the healing. I use to think I had ALL the answers and now. Sometimes I look in the mirror and ask, “Who are you? What do you believe NOW?”

    Your words help to bring things into a proper perspective and light for me. Thank you for that.

    • Jessie, thanks for your comment. It is such a journey and I’m glad to have your encouragement reach me today. We are all trying to figure out the way home, but I hope to find rest knowing I don’t have to have the whole map yet. Just one step at a time, one day at a time with His new mercies.

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